When I see a Kohl’s Department Store, I’ll think of you

MILWAUKEE — At the spry young age of 76, Senator Herb Kohl announced his intent to retire from elected office today.

“I’ve always believed it is better to leave a job a little too early than a little too late,” Kohl said at a news conference at his Milwaukee office.

“The interest and energy I had for this job will find a new home,” he said.

Let’s hope that a retired Kohl, owner of the Milwaukee Bucks franchise since 1985, can harness that energy (or should I say, ‘Energee!’?) and focus it on getting the Bucks back to the playoffs next season.

An Open Letter to Atlanta

Dear Atlanta,

Did you really just cancel tonight’s basketball game vs. the Milwaukee Bucks?

Who are you, Philadelphia?!

BUCK UP, you fucking pansies.

Is it even snowing in Atlanta? Is it even supposed to snow in Atlanta?!

One concern was having enough staff at Philips Arena to work the game. Ice and snow hit north Georgia on Sunday and made travel difficult around Atlanta. Portions of some roads were closed.

So let me get this straight: You canceled the game because you’re afraid that nobody would come to work at the arena tonight? Because there’s a little leftover ice around town?

Get real.

Well, you’re definitely afraid of something, Atlanta.

Are you afraid that your little nips were going to get chafed out there in that extreme weather (33°F, 7 mph wind)?*

The Hawks were scheduled to leave after the game to travel to Toronto for Wednesday’s game against the Raptors. The de-icing truck for the Hawks’ private plane was stuck on an interstate for a time Tuesday.

Oh for the love of God.

You see, Atlanta, it’s actually snowing in Toronto. That’s part of what those of us living above the Mason-Dixon line call ‘winter.’ Look it up; it happens every year. 

So wipe off your vaginas, warm up your nipples, and get your shit together, Atlanta. Because this is America, and sometimes it snows. Get used to it.

Love,

Wisconsin

P.S. If this is how you react to ice, I can’t wait to see how your Falcons react to Clay Matthews, B.J. Raji, Ryan Pickett, and the rest of the Green Bay Packers’ defense this Sunday in the playoffs.

*I was being sarcastic. 33°F is back-to-school weather for Wisconsin you fucking pussies.

Redd to donate 150 Thanksgiving Dinners

Bucks guard provides Thanksgiving dinner to families in need for eighth-consecutive season

Bucks guard Michael Redd will continue his yearly holiday volunteer service in the Milwaukee community today by buying and helping to distribute 150 Thanksgiving meals with the House of Peace, a Capuchin ministry (1702 West Walnut Street, Milwaukee) for families in need.

This will be the eighth straight year that our 11-year Bucks veteran has donated Thanksgiving meals to the Milwaukee community. Registered families will receive the holiday food baskets and turkeys at the House of Peace between 2:30-3:30 p.m.

That’s what we like to see! Someone helping Milwaukee both on and off the court.

Mr. Redd, Milwaukee thanks you.

Hm…I found this bumper sticker online today.

And although hilarious, I somehow doubt the Milwaukee Bucks endorse this slogan.

But I think I speak for most Milwaukeeans alcoholics when I say that it’d be a lot cooler if they did.

These are the new players added to the Milwaukee Bucks’ roster by John Hammond:

• John Salmons
• Drew Gooden
• Corey Maggette
• Chris Douglas-Roberts
• Keyon Dooling
• Larry Sanders

Folding (or rolling, rather) laundry…my t-shirts are ridiculous.

The Young Buck himself, rookie Brandon Jennings at the basketball court by the Miller Oasis stage at Summerfest doing something or other…go Bucks.